The Duke Nukem Workout

Duke Nukem Quick Navigation Links:
Character Breakdown: Duke Nukem
The Duke Nukem Workout
The Skills of Duke Nukem
The Swagger of Duke Nukem

First off, I’m going to begin this post with a shoutout to Nerd Forum.  If you need me to explain what it is…well…  Anyway, I joined up a few days ago, it’s an AWESOME little forum, and the people are quite pleasant.  Go register and say hi!  My username there is, of course, DaRatmastah.

ALRIGHT, SISSIES, IT’S TIME TO GET IN DUKE NUKEM SHAPE!!

First off, we don’t need no freakin’ cardio here!  You know what Duke Nukem Cardio is?  FACEPUNCHING SOME FREAKIN’ ALIENS!  If you really want some cardio, I guess you could go ahead and grab a punching bag, to practice FACEPUNCHING!  Also kicking.  The Mighty Boot must remain ever-honed to perfection.

I would recommend eating a HUGE AMOUNT of food, since we’re trying to get HUGE.  Probably something like the Big Guy Diet.  Remember, if flexing your biceps around some ugly pig’s neck doesn’t pop his damn head off, then you just aren’t eating and lifting enough!

Also, make sure you always warm up before exercising!  I did a video tutorial on how to warm up properly, so check it out!

Now let’s see what equipment you’re gonna need!

Equipment:
Weight bench
Squat rack
Barbell with weight plates
Dumbells with weight plates

Strength Workout A:
3×10 Bent-over Row(barbell or dumbells)
3×10 Military Press(barbell or dumbells)
3×10 Shoulder Shrugs(dumbells)
3×10 Bicep Curls(dumbells)

Strength Workout B:
3×10 Bench Press(barbell or dumbells)
3×10 Incline Bench Press(barbell or dumbells)
3×10 Behind the Neck Press(barbell)
3×10 Triceps Extension(dumbells)

Strength Workout C:
3×10 Back Squat(barbell)
3×10 Straight Legged Deadlifts(barbell or dumbells)
3×10 Standing Calf Raise(dumbells)
3×10 Trunk Twists(weight plate)
3×10 Oblique Side Bends(dumbell, ten times each side)

Schedule
Day 1: Strength Workout A
Day 2: Rest (or facepunching)
Day 3: Strength Workout B
Day 4: Rest (or more facepunching)
Day 5: Strength Workout C
Day 6: Rest
Day 7: Rest

Remember if you want to GET BIG you need to REST BIG too.  Take a day off between each workout, so your muscles have time to heal.  Get lots of sleep and food in you, too, you gotta nourish that body.

Now, Duke’s got no time for sissies, but even more he doesn’t have time for broken sissies, so don’t get yourself injured by starting with too much weight.  Even Duke had to start somewhere, and there’s no shame in starting with just the weight of the bar.  Also, there’s no shame in cutting down reps if you have to, but don’t cut out whole sets, or Duke will find you, and he will discipline you.

Later today we’ll be going over the Skills of Duke Nukem, so make sure to check back tonight! Until then, make sure to follow me on Twitter,  like the blog page on Facebook, hit up the Tumblr, and continue to be awesome!

Dan “DaRatmastah” Wallace